Happy New Year!

January 1st. A new year, new beginnings, a day of hope, dreams remembered, a day to cast aside mistakes and face the future. A day of joy, considering of life, anticipating with wonder all that will come. A day of reflection, an attitude of starting afresh, renewed energy, a spirit of confidence.

January 1st. For me, this year, it is a day both of mourning and rebirth. A child that we had longed for, prayed for, and carried in our hearts, our minds, and my body was due on New Year's Day. Overjoyed, we had shared our happy news with family and a few close friends. There was unspeakable joy that this miracle we had been waiting for was coming and would be expected on a day the entire world would also be celebrating in expectancy and arrival.

But, it was not meant to be.

My dear husband Monroe and I have been married since 2000. We have two remarkable children, Grace and Clark. He has given us a healthy family, beautiful children, and a life paved with blessings. We love our children and our family so much, and we would love to see our family grow. In fact, when we still thought we had any control in the matter, we decided to start planning for another child. That was back in June of 2010 when Clark was 3 years old. We are still waiting.

But in the waiting, God has been teaching. We have been learning and praying and seeking. We are not sad; we simply know that God has something in store for our family. We still get impatient, and we still question. We are still human.

Despite losing a child this year, God has given me joy. A pure joy that rejoices that, for a time, there was another child growing both in my body and in my heart. He has given me a joy that transcends the pain and brings me comfort even as every day I think of this child. He has proven that He is my Rock and Redeemer.

This blog is starting because God has been whispering to me that there are stories of His strength that need to be told. I will not focus on the pain of my miscarriage but instead will focus on the joy He has given me. The joy of the Lord that is my Strength.

Recently, on my birthday, Grace gave me a homemade card with a story enclosed about butterflies. It was such an exquisite story, we thought she must have read it somewhere and copied it into my card. When she told us that she made it up, I considered all the writing that Grace has done in the past. She loves to write letters and cards and things to cheer people. And, it was that night that this Mommy~Daughter blog idea was born.

We will write not within our own strength or knowledge but with the help of God. We are commanded to share His love and His story. We hope and pray that these words might point to the One who loved you before you were born and who can save you from an eternity without Him.

#mommydaughterblog #miscarriage #joy